This probably isn’t painful for Canadian soccer fans to watch. Their under 17 football (soccer) team tied England in the final minutes on a long kick by the goal keeper that took a freak bounce and when over the head of England’s goal keeper.
Apparently being drunk and shouting profanities are still okay at football (soccer) matches, but singing God Save the Queen or making the sign of the cross now violates Scotland’s new anti-bigotry laws at sporting events. Local police still aren’t sure how this will be enforced, but already worry that the approximately $2 million set aside for enforcement won’t be nearly enough.
What’s the best solution if you local soccer team isn’t bringing in the fans like it used to? Hire a bunch of scantily clad women as cheerleaders, that’s what you do. Until, of course, the team–in this case Crystal Palace in the UK–continues to lose, then some of the fans will blame these hotties for “distracting the players” as if grown men have never seen a woman dancing like . . . just a minute . . . we lost our train of thought there for a second. It has something to do with sports, we think, uh . . . was there a HS coach sex scandal involved here?
Oh, never mind, there’s a video of The Crystals dancing at halftime or period break or whatever they call it in soccer. Do they seem like a distraction to you?
First, some more on this breaking sports story from The Metro:
But with the team falling to just above the bottom three, fans say the cheerleaders – called The Crystals – are a ‘waste of time’ because they are distracting the team. Online forum users have slagged them off for ‘looking silly’.
‘They are just pole dancers on grass and they should be stopped – they are not doing the team any favours,’ said one internet blogger. Gareth Pollock, 24, said: ‘When they come out waving their pom-poms I just hang my head.’
He added: ‘They put everyone off the game – you see the players eyeing them up when they should be focusing on the game. The sooner they go the better.’ But The Crystals have hit back, saying the fans should ‘grow up’. ‘The comments are quite nasty,’ said cheerleader Amie Latter, 23, who is a season ticket holder at Selhurst Park in south London and works in investment management.
First off, right up until the end, this is the most boring streaker video we have ever seen. They guy runs out with some kind of Afro wig on and then no one chases him. And when security does start to close in, they don’t seem real interested in tackling his naked behind. (Would you?)
Finally, a soccer player on the yellow team takes matters into his own hands and steer tackles the guy. (Rather well for a soccer player, we might add.)
The result? He gets a yellow card from the obviously “pro male nudity” referee, the player argues, and then is given a red card–meaning he’s out of the game and must stay after school for detention for a week . . . or something like that. You’d think the ref would be happy to get the game going again but NOOOOOOO! The video is mostly Safe For Work as it was taken from quite a distance and the streaker seems to be as well endowed as a Ken doll.
Anyone else remember the holiday movie classic “A Christmas Story?” In it, little Ralphie wants nothing more than a Red Rider BB Gun for Christmas, but all the adults in his life keep telling him that he’ll “shoot his eye out.” Apparently UK soccer star Ashley “Deadeye” Cole never saw that movie or he would not have pulled a 22 caliber air rifle out of a box in the locker room at soccer training camp for the Chelsea and ‘accidentally’ shot an intern working for the club. We’re putting accidentally in quotes because it’s odd that with all the other players and staff around, he manages to hit the only person who’s not on salary with the club. What are the odds of that? And he just happened to have the gun with him and just happened to pull it out at that time, and just happened not to know it was loaded? Either this Cole guy is a complete moron (possible with soccer players) or this just might not have been as much of an ‘accident’ as the club is letting on.
Wonder how soon before the intern has a full time paid job with Chelsea . . . to keep his mouth shut.
Details from ESPN:
Chelsea defender Ashley Cole has allegedly shot and wounded an intern at the club after “larking” around with an air rifle, according to the News of the World. The incident happened last Sunday at the Chelsea’s Cobham training ground when Cole took the .22 gun from a box, not realising it was loaded, and accidentially fired at Tom Cowan, 21, from just five feet away.
A source told the News of the World: “It’s truly inconceivable that a Premier League footballer could bring a gun to the training ground.
“But Ashley pulled the rifle from a box and started larking about with it in the changing room, not realising it was loaded. It ended up pointed at Tom just five feet away. “The gun went off with a loud pop and Tom screamed as this lead pellet hit him in the side. It went through his clothing and into his flesh.”
Basically it comes down to them questioning if this young female referee even under stood what “off sides” was in soccer, in large part because, well, she’s a woman and women folk don’t understand this complicated rule. (Below the video of the incident is a video make by comedian John Cleese three years ago that explains how complicated the soccer off sides rule really is.) Actually, from my limited experience reporting on soccer stories for BadJocks, it seems that the off-sides rule is used, more often than not, by home town referees to disallow almost goal made by the visiting team. The results is usually rioting by visiting fans.
Here’s more on the story from The Guardian:
Andy Gray, the Sky Sports presenter at the centre of a sexism storm following derogatory comments about a female official, has been sacked by the broadcaster in response to “new evidence of unacceptable and offensive behaviour”. Sky Sports’ managing director Barney Francis, who yesterday disciplined both Gray and Richard Keys for their comments, said he had “no hesitation” in summarily terminating Gray’s contract.
“Andy Gray’s contract has been terminated for unacceptable behaviour. After issuing a warning yesterday, we have no hesitation in taking this action after becoming aware of new information today,” he said. Sky said in a statement that the new evidence related to “an off-air incident that took place in December 2010″ and “came to light after Andy Gray had already been subjected to disciplinary action for his comments of 22 January 2011″.
John Cleese Explains Soccer’s Off-Sides Rule