We’re assuming he did this to avoid some kind of penalty stroke, or maybe just to show how macho he was. Either way, Sergio Garcia somehow got up into a tree to hit his second from a tree near the fairway on the par-4 10th hole one-handed and backwards, during the 2013 Arnold Palmer Invitational presented by MasterCard,
There’s nothing like spending a nice, leisurely day on the golf course enjoying sun, your friends and the occasional drunk driver who just happens to be stuck in a bunker next to the 14th green. Meet Patricia A. Maione, 46, of Uxbridge, MA who claims she ended up in the sand trap at the Whitinsville Golf Club in Northbridge because her GPS told her to turn left into a cornfield and she did.
Once in the (bleeping) cornfield, of course, she had no choice but to keep going which is how she ended up on the golf course, driving 45 mph at one point. Apparently the GPS also told her to turn into the bunker, which ultimately stopped her car and lead to her arrest by police. Maione claims that the half a liter of vodka she allegedly consumed earlier in the day (this happened in the middle of the afternoon) played no role in her misfortune. And the cup of booze that cops found inside the car was just there for safe keeping, right?
Maione was charged with driving with a suspended license; drunken driving, fourth offense; negligent driving; and driving with an open container of alcohol in the car.
Why does this guy look like he should be a fan at a hockey game and not a major golf tournament?
Okay, so it’s been more than a day since we first saw the story of the two women in St. Louis area who were arrested for flashing their breasts at an Illinois golf course on Monday. Here’s what we know for sure:
1) Alicia Binford, 43, and Shelly Lewis, 45 were allegedly for showing their breasts to male golfers.
2) Binford and Lewis were NOT playing golf according to police.
2) The original complaint was called in by someone who drove by the course (which is in a residential area) and could see the ladies flashing groups of golfers from a road.
3) The Madison County, IL Sheriff’s Department was called, observed the same behavior and promptly charged with indecency, but were later released on $100 bond.
What we don’t know is whether these ladies were amateurs or pros? You see, at BadJocks, this isn’t the first time we’ve heard of strippers uh, “participating” in golf tournaments. Based on our secondhand knowledge though, usually they women hired to “work” these events are . . . how shall we put this delicately . . . younger. Not that you have to be 19 to be an attractive stripper, but don’t most of the pros hang it up by their mid-thirties? (I’m sure some BadJocks reader with more extensive knowledge in this area will correct us.)
This is not to say that Ms. Binford and Ms. Lewis are not attractive women. At least one source is saying that Ms. Binford is the owner of the Binford Bar and Grill in nearby St. Peters, MO and–based on photos at their website–she and her friends (assuming it’s the same Alicia Binforda: please let us know if it is not) dress up in costume for parties at the bar and can be seen as Santa’s Little Helpers and Playboy Bunnies. It looks like a fun place.
So, we’re back to our original question: assuming the cops arrested the right two female flashers (another report says they nabbed the wrong pair of pairs) were they being paid to do this or were they just flashing for free? And if they were doing it for free, why? (Okay, we know why they male golfers would want to see it, but why would a couple of mature ladies risk getting arrested?) And also, would this violate some kind of ordinance against amateurs taking work away from union strippers?
Or is Illinois a “right to strip” state?
All Albert Miller, 75, of Lake Wales, FL wanted last week was to retrieve his ball from an irrigation pond near the 15th hole at Lake Ashton Golf and Country Club. He found two balls that didn’t belong to him, turned to head back to the course when a 9 foot long, 190 lb decided to retrieve HIM from the land and return him to the pond. (“This isn’t my geezer golfer! I was playing a 68-year-old New Yorker!”)
The gator started pulling Miller into the water–and also certain death–when other members of his foursome arrived to help. Here’s more on the story from the Lakeland Ledger:
“He lifted me up three feet and slammed me down,” Miller said. Price ran over and grabbed Miller under his shoulders while the animal was thrashing and pulling. The other two golfers in the foursome ran over to help. Miller said the animal took one look at him and clamped down harder. “It was excruciating to say the least,” Miller said.
As the animal started dragging Miller into the water, Miller prayed for a miracle. He got one. “He let me go,” Miller said. “I was three feet from my life. He had me submerged up to my belt buckle. That was my miracle of the month.” The man-made pond has a sharp drop-off just two to three feet from the bank, Miller said. Any further, and the animal could have pulled him under water.
Price said the alligator “stayed right there,” waiting in the water just off shore. “If a person had been there by himself, it’s safe to say that he would have been dragged into the water,” Price said. Miller’s leg was a “mess,” Price said. They wrapped his knee in a towel, drove the golf cart over to him, and drove to the front gate to meet an ambulance. In the emergency room at Winter Haven Hospital, Miller had to have 35 to 40 stitches to close a 10-inch lance wound, and two other 5-inch wounds. “He just filleted me,” he said. “You could see into the bone.”
Last week, we had a story about a guy who lived next to a golf course and complained constantly to the city about the obnoxious, potty-mouthed, drunken golfers who were constantly urinating in his yard. This week, the exact opposite: a guy who had lemons and made lemonade . . . or in this case, some cash on the side. Allegedly Joe Albert Wolfe, 39, who lived next to Alondra Park Golf Course, was making it a habit of stealing golf bags and clubs from players and then just walking back to his house on the course. This time though, some undercover cops spotted the theft, following him back to his place and not only recovered the stolen items, they also found five pounds of marijuana, a 9 mm handgun with the serial numbers removed, digital scales and more than $2,000 in cash. Good work there, Lou.