Early Sunday morning, check (it’s always ‘early Sunday morning’, diagnosis isn’t it?), University of Utah linebacker Nai Fatu was parked in his Ford Explorer facing the wrong way on S.R. 201, when one of those pesky State Troopers shows up. The police had been getting calls about a car going the wrong way on I-80. (Scenes from Trains, Plains, and Automobiles are running through my head right now).
As the trooper is patting down Fotu and asking questions, Fotu responds to the “how much have you been drinking” question with, “I had a little bit”.
“A little bit?” the trooper says, ” You know you’re driving the wrong way on the freeway?”
“I understand”, says Fotu, like that is going to help. I think it would be better to look as if you were driving in the wrong direction on an Interstate because you were drunk, and did not understand. If you are sober and well aware of what you are doing, that kind of looks worse, doesn’t it?
Anyway, the dash cam video in the squad car shows him failing the sobriety test, and you can hear that he is obviously slurring. It is a pretty interesting back and forth. Here is more from Utah’s KSL Channel 5 site:
The trooper pats Fotu down and suspects he’s been drinking.
“How much have you had to drink tonight?” the trooper asks
“I had a little bit,” Fotu responds.
The trooper says, “A little bit? You know you’re driving the wrong way on the freeway?”
“I understand,” Fotu says.
Fotu tells the trooper he was with his teammates at the university.
“Just one beer, two beer, that’s all,” he says.
Fotu slurs his words during another conversation with the trooper.
“Do you even know where you are right now?” the trooper asks.
“Yes, I do,” Fotu says. “I’m in Utah.”
“You’re in Utah? Where in Utah are you?” the trooper asks.
“I’m on the freeway,” Fotu says.
Fotu’s blood alcohol was almost three times the legal limit. He was charged with DUI, not having a valid license, and “several charges”, Channel 5 says. Several, eh? Is there more here? Sometimes the word “several” is mistakenly used, which must be the case. Several usually means more than a few. Must be a lot of traffic violations.
It has been a few articles now, so I think it is time to say again to stars and sports figures everywhere, “Get a freakin’ driver! You can afford it!”
I know it doesn’t help, but I think it’a a law now that you have to say it in every third article about public figures driving drunk, or something like that.
Most who read Bad Jocks are intelligent, I know. However, I also know I have to say this, for all the morons out there; “Just Kidding”.